How to change your life: a real case. Life changes. How do you decide to make changes in your life? How to change yourself and your life? Where to begin

Programmer, investor and entrepreneur James Altucher, who has already launched several startups, published on TechCrunch a very simple, useful and honest guide for those who want to radically change their field of activity, but do not know where to start. Below is a translation of this article.

Here's the deal: I've been at zero a few times, come back to life a few times, I've done it over and over again. I started new careers. The people who knew me then don't know me now. Etc.

I started my career from scratch several times. Sometimes - because my interests changed. Sometimes - because all the bridges were burned without a trace, and sometimes because I desperately needed money. And sometimes it was because I hated everyone at my previous job or they hated me.

There are other ways to reinvent yourself, so take my words with a grain of salt. This is what worked in my case. I've seen it work for about a hundred other people. From interviews, from letters that have been written to me over the past 20 years. You can try - or not.

1. Change never ends

Every day you rediscover yourself. You are always on the move. But every day you decide where exactly you are moving: forward or backward.

2. Start with a clean slate

All your past labels are just vanity. Have you been a doctor? An Ivy League graduate? Owned millions? Did you have a family? Nobody cares. You have lost everything. You are zero. Don't try to say that you are more than that.

3. You need a mentor

Otherwise, you will go under. Someone has to show you how to move and breathe. But don't worry about looking for a mentor (see below).

4. Three types of mentors

Straight. Someone who is ahead of you, who will show you how he got it. What does "this" mean? Wait. By the way, the mentors don't look like Jackie Chan's character in The Karate Kid. Most mentors will hate you.

Indirect. Books. Films. You can get 90% of the instructions from books and other materials. 200-500 books equate to a good mentor. When people ask me, “What is a good book to read?” - I do not know what to answer them. There are 200-500 good books worth reading. I would turn to inspirational books. Whatever you believe in, strengthen your beliefs with daily reading.

Anything can be a mentor. If you are nobody and want to re-create yourself, everything you look at can become a metaphor for your desires and goals. The tree you see, with its roots out of sight and the groundwater that feeds it, is a metaphor for programming if you tie the dots together. And everything you look at will "connect the dots".

5. Don't Worry If Nothing Excites You

You care about your health. Start with it. Take small steps. You don't need passion to succeed. Do your job with love, and success will become a natural symptom.

6. Time it takes to reinvent yourself: five years

Here is a description of those five years.

Year 1: You wallow and read everything and just start doing something.

Year 2: You know who you need to talk to and keep working with. You do something every day. You finally understand what the map of your own game of Monopoly looks like.

Third year: You are good enough to start making money. But so far, perhaps not enough to earn a living.

Fourth year: You provide for yourself well.

Year 5: You make a fortune.

Sometimes I got frustrated in the first four years. I asked myself, "Why hasn't this happened yet?" - He beat his fist on the wall and broke his arm. It's okay, just keep going. Or stop and choose a new field of activity. It does not matter. Someday you will die, and then it will be really difficult to change.

7. If you do it too fast or too slow, then something is wrong.

A good example is Google.

8. It's not about the money

But money is a good measure. When people say, "It's not about the money," they need to be sure they have some other unit of measure. "How about just doing what you love?" There will be many days ahead when you don't like what you do. If you are doing it out of pure love, it will take much more than five years. Happiness is just a positive reaction from your brain. Some days you will be unhappy. Your brain is just a tool, it does not define who you are.

9. When can you say, "I'm doing X"? When does X become your new profession?

10. When can I start doing X?

Today. If you want to paint, buy a canvas and paints today, start buying 500 books one by one and paint pictures. If you want to write, do the following three things:

Read

If you want to start your own business, start coming up with an idea for a business. Rebuilding yourself starts today. Every day.

11. When will I earn money?

In a year, you will put 5,000-7,000 hours into this business. That's good enough to put you in the top 200-300 in the world in any major. Getting into the top 200 almost always provides a livelihood. By the third year, you will understand how to make money. By the fourth - you will be able to increase turnover and provide for yourself. Some stop there.

12. By year 5 you will be in the top 30-50 so you can make a fortune

13. How to determine what is mine?

Any area in which you are able to read 500 books. Go to the bookstore and find her. If you get bored after three months, go back to the bookstore. Getting rid of illusions is normal, this is the meaning of defeat. Success is better than failure, but the most important lessons come from failure. Very important: do not rush. During your interesting life, you can change yourself many times. And fail many times. It's fun too. These attempts will turn your life into a story book, not a textbook. Some people want their life to be a textbook. Mine is a story book, good or bad. Therefore, changes occur every day.

14. The decisions you make today will be in your biography tomorrow.

Make interesting decisions and you will have an interesting biography.

15. The decisions you make today will become part of your biology.

16. What if I like something exotic? Biblical archeology or 11th century wars?

Repeat the above steps and by the fifth year you will be rich. We don't know how. There is no need to look for the end of the path when you are only taking the first steps.

17. What if my family wants me to become an accountant?

How many years of your life did you promise to give to your family? Ten? All life? Then wait for the next life. You choose.

Choose freedom, not family. Freedom, not prejudice. Freedom, not government. Freedom, not the satisfaction of other people's requests. Then you will satisfy yours.

18. My mentor wants me to follow his path.

This is fine. Learn his way. Then do it your way. Sincerely.

Luckily no one puts a gun to your head. Then you would have to comply with his demands until he lowers the gun.

19. My husband (wife) is worried: who will take care of our children?

A person who changes himself always finds free time. Part of changing yourself is finding moments and reshaping them the way you would like to use them.

20. What if my friends think I'm crazy?

What are these friends?

21. What if I want to be an astronaut?

It's not about changing yourself. This is a specific profession. If you like space, there are many professions. Richard Branson wanted to be an astronaut and created Virgin Galactic.

22. What if I enjoy drinking and hanging out with friends?

Read this post again in a year.

23. And if I'm busy? Am I cheating on my spouse or betraying my partner?

Read this post again in two or three years, when you are broke, out of work, and everyone will turn their backs on you.

24. What if I can't do anything at all?

Read point 2 again.

25. What if I don't have a diploma or it's useless?

Read point 2 again.

26. What if I need to focus on paying off a mortgage or other loan?

Read point 19 again.

27. Why do I always feel like an outsider?

Albert Einstein was an outsider. No one in authority would have hired him. Everyone feels like an impostor sometimes. The greatest creativity is born out of skepticism.

28. I can't read 500 books. Name one book to read for inspiration

Then you can immediately give up.

29. What if I'm too sick to change myself?

The change will boost the production of beneficial substances in your body: serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin. Move forward, and you may not get well at all, but you will get healthier. Don't use health as an excuse.

Finally, rebuild your health first. Sleep more. Eat better. Go in for sports. These are the key steps to change.

30. What if my partner set me up and I'm still suing him?

Drop the lawsuit and never think about him again. Half the problem was you.

31. And if they put me in jail?

Perfectly. Re-read point 2. Read more books in prison.

32. And if I'm a timid person?

Make weakness your strength. Introverts are better at listening and concentrating, they know how to arouse sympathy.

33. What if I can't wait five years?

If you plan to stay alive in five years, you can start today.

34. How to make contacts?

Build concentric circles. You must be in the middle. The next circle is friends and family. Then there are online communities. Then - people whom you know from informal meetings and tea parties. Then - conference participants and opinion leaders in their field. Then there are mentors. Then - customers and those who make money. Start making your way through these circles.

35. What if my ego gets in the way of what I do?

After six months or a year, you will return to point 2.

36. What if I am passionate about two things at once? And I can't choose?

Combine them and you will be the best in the world for this combination.

37. What if I'm so passionate that I want to teach others what I'm learning myself?

Read lectures on YouTube. Start with a one-person audience and see if it grows.

38. What if I want to earn money in my sleep?

In the fourth year, start outsourcing what you do.

39. How to find mentors and experts?

Once you have accumulated enough knowledge (after 100-200 books), write 10 ideas for 20 different potential mentors.

None of them will answer you. Write 10 more ideas for 20 new mentors. Repeat this every week.

40. What if I can't come up with ideas?

Then practice it. The mental muscles tend to atrophy. They need to be trained.

It will be difficult for me to reach my toes if I don't exercise every day. I have to do this exercise every day for some time before this posture comes easily to me. Don't expect good ideas from day one.

42. What if I do everything you say, but it still doesn't seem to work?

It will turn out. Just wait. Keep changing yourself every day.

Don't try to find the end of the path. You can't see it in the fog. But you can see the next step, and you will understand that if you take it, you will eventually reach the end of the path.

43. What if I start feeling down?

Sit in silence for an hour a day. You need to get back to your core.

If you think this sounds stupid, don't do it. Move on with your depression.

44. And if there is no time to sit in silence?

Then sit in silence for two hours a day. This is not meditation. You just have to sit.

45. And if I get scared?

Sleep 8-9 hours a night and never gossip. Sleep is the first secret to good health. Not the only one, but the first. Some people write to me that four hours of sleep is enough for them, or that in their country those who sleep a lot are considered lazy. These people will fail and die young.

When it comes to gossip, our brains are biologically programmed to have 150 friends. And when you hang out with one of your friends, you can gossip about one of the other 150. And if you don't have 150 friends, then the brain will want to read gossip magazines until it looks like it has 150 friends.

Don't be as stupid as your brain.

46. ​​And if everything seems to me that I will never succeed?

Practice gratitude for 10 minutes a day. Don't suppress your fear. Notice your anger.

But also allow yourself to be grateful for what you have. Anger never inspires, but gratitude never inspires. Gratitude is the bridge between your world and the parallel universe where all creative ideas live.

47. And if I constantly have to deal with some kind of personal squabbles?

Find other people to be around.

A person who changes himself will constantly meet people who try to suppress him. The brain is afraid of change - it can be unsafe. Biologically, the brain wants you to be safe, and change is a risk. So your brain will give you people trying to stop you.

Learn to say no.

Human nature is such that we are always striving to improve our lives. Even those who have already achieved many of their goals, from time to time ask themselves the question - how else can you change your life? And people who value stability, nevertheless, will never refuse, for example, from a salary increase, a pleasant acquaintance, or some other change in life for the better.

Why is it necessary to change lives? Is it bad when it flows in its own way, measuredly and smoothly? Having achieved favorable conditions - a stable job, their own apartment, a beautiful family - people often fold their hands and begin to think that there is nowhere to improve their lives even more, and there is no need. And what is the result? After some time, work begins to bother, a period of misunderstanding sets in in the family, and the apartment, it turns out, could be bigger and more comfortable. A person simply becomes bored, because in order to get joy from life and be successful, it is important to develop and not stand still.

Therefore, no matter how successful life may seem, there are always ways to improve it. We will suggest several different areas in which you can make progress - take your pick and decide what could be done today!


How to change your life

To improve your life, first decide what exactly you would like to change. Someone can say - everything is fine with me, I don’t need to change anything. But don't such people deep down want progress? After all, changing life is not necessarily a rejection of existing benefits, it is also the emergence of something new. Career growth or the birth of a long-awaited child are also changes, and, moreover, pleasant ones.

Are you determined to change your life for the better? Then let's figure out which way to move. First, decide on your goals and aspirations. Someone already knows for a long time what he wants and achieves. But it will not be superfluous for such purposeful individuals to take a closer look at themselves - just to make sure that they are moving in the right direction.

1. Ask yourself questions.

What is my life like now and how much do I like it? How do I want to see her? What do I like to do and what can I do now? What concessions for the sake of this am I ready to make, and what will I not do? This sets the stage for future changes and lets the brain know that its owner is serious.


2. Understand yourself.

Take two sheets of paper, write down your strengths on one and your weaknesses on the other. Now, on the first one opposite each item, write what you would like to improve and develop - for example, not only to read in English, but also to speak fluently with native speakers. And on the second - what can be done to mitigate or eliminate these shortcomings. You will immediately see the future front of work.

3. Build an action plan for the coming year based on these two lists.

Every month, focus on one of the items from each. A new habit is established in 21 days - thus every month you can develop and consolidate one useful one and find a replacement for one harmful one. Think about how to combine these points: for example, in April you can start going out for morning runs, and for this you will have to learn how to get up early and, accordingly, not stay up in the evening. And before that, you can learn to devote not two hours a day to social networks, but one, and in the free time to make entries in your diary, cook, do your hobbies or household chores.

4. Take responsibility for your life.

Tell yourself: from this moment on, my life is changed by my powers. Even for those who find fault in their failures in the strictness of their parents and unhappy childhood, it is important to realize that changes in life are the work of their own hands. Give up the thought of waiting for outside help and looking for someone to blame. This is a change in the way of thinking, which unties the hands and makes it much freer.

5. Learn to look at life with optimism.

In everything that happens, highlight the positive side. Have you been sold a defective product? You now have experience with a store manager, and besides, you know how important it is to collect a check. Take advantage of everything you come across.

6. Be prepared for not the most favorable outcome.

This does not contradict the previous point: in the same case with the purchase, you can hope that everything will be fine with it, or you can take into account the unpleasant option and reserve the opportunity to return the money. An optimist is not the one who looks at life through rose-colored glasses, but the one who sees both sides of the issue, consciously choosing the positive from them.

7. Replace apologies with gratitude.

This does not apply if you stepped on someone's foot, but in many cases it is useful to replace self-abasement and attempts to see your guilt with respect for yourself and at the same time understanding for others. Instead of “sorry for bothering me with my problems” - “thank you for your caring”. Instead of “sorry to wake you up” - “thanks for paying attention, I remember that you sleep at such a time, but this was an exceptional case.”

8. And at the same time, train yourself to be attentive to people.

No amount of gratitude will save those who regularly wake up with phone calls or overload with their problems from conflict.

9. Start timing.

Spend the day writing down each of your activities - down to brushing your teeth - and the time it takes. You can discover the most curious facts: an intimidatingly difficult task, the implementation of which takes half a day to persuade yourself, in fact takes only twenty minutes, and innocent surfing the Internet takes two hours, flying by like five minutes. Manage your time, use it wisely.

10. If the results of the previous paragraph showed that time really goes wrong, learn time management.

How exactly can this technique be applied? Here are a few ways to get your life in order with it.

11. Develop a sense of timing.

Take one minute, close your eyes and try to determine when it will pass. When you feel that the right moment has come, open your eyes and compare your result with a stopwatch. You will most likely see that time, as we perceive it, differs from the actual course. We think that only an hour has passed, but in fact - “oh, how late it is!”

Practice this exercise more often - in line, in the elevator, and it is especially convenient when you are waiting for the subway train and see the stopwatch. Gradually increase the interval from a minute to two, five, ten. It will also be useful to learn to guess what time it is. All this will help you become the master of your time.

12. Get rid of tasks that you perform unnecessarily long, to the detriment of other things.

If you can find a faster replacement - try to do it. Or even delegate the task.

Do you really need to cook a three-course meal every day? Maybe you can get by with simpler recipes or get family help? Are you sure that you need to go to the store across the city - maybe it's more rational to make a purchase near the house or order delivery?

The time spent should always be compensated for in some way - if not with money, then with pleasure, good health or benefit in the future. Wherever you can reduce the amount of time, do so.

13. Determine what extraneous factors "eat up" time.

Maybe a chat with a neighbor or an employee who came up for a minute and talked for half an hour? Or work meetings? Highlight what happens more than once a week, and talk to the "culprits", explain that you can give them no more than a certain interval - five to ten minutes.

14. Try to make the most of every minute of your time.

Do sit-ups while the meatballs are frying, solve sudoku or memorize English words while waiting for the elevator.

The next few tips are not directly related to time management, but are certainly related to both time and improving the quality of life.

15. Set aside 7-8 hours of sleep.

This is the same necessary procedure for the body as an inspection for a car or cleaning the registry for a computer - it will help you work faster and better and protect you from more serious and expensive repairs.

16. Go to bed at the same time.

So the body will be easier to get used to and tune in.

17. If you feel overwhelmed in the morning, try not to increase the duration of sleep, but vice versa - reduce it by half an hour.

This is due to the change in fast and slow sleep phases: by moving from one to another, you can make it easier to get up.

18. If you decide to relax and take a nap during the day, allocate no more than fifteen minutes for this.

A longer sleep will bring a feeling of weakness instead of a feeling of relaxation.

Fifteen minutes is not so little if you change your life during this period and do it every day. Here are some examples.

19. Make it a habit to do something for your home every day.

Dust or dust the floors, put things in their places or vacuum, and the weekly general cleaning will be reduced by an hour and a half. Here it is the same as in sports: short-term, but regular exercises are more effective than long loads once every 2 months. First we feed our house - then it feeds us.

20. Go in for sports.

What can be done in 15 minutes? For example, stand in a plank, do a few push-ups or pull-ups, or perform a complex of therapeutic exercises.

21. Dance.

If you think you don't know how, just move to your favorite music. The body will figure out what it lacks to relax tense places.

Arrange a brainstorming session for a problem.

23. Read.

Fifteen minutes is not long enough to focus on a serious book, but enough for a short story or Wikipedia article.

24. Meditate.

Relax your mind and body, listen to the sensations - clamps, persistent thoughts.

25. Draw.

Do not be afraid that you will not get a masterpiece - do it for your own pleasure.

26. Call friends or relatives you rarely see.

27. Write a blog or diary entry.

Often people don't do what they would like to do because they think there is no time for it. A task that seems massive is intimidating. But try to do it in small portions, and in a week you will see the first results.


How to improve life

From simple daily tasks, let's move on to more serious practices. What can and should be changed in the mind to make life better?

28. Develop critical thinking.

Check the information you receive.

29. Listen first of all to the advice that was asked for.


30. And do not give advice yourself if they were not asked.

And if you decide to offer something, ask the person if he is ready to listen. If someone's decision seems strange and wrong, get to know the situation before giving your opinion.

31. Avoid generalizations, talk only about the present moment.

Instead of "you keep throwing things around" - "you took this book and didn't put it on the shelf, and I couldn't find it for a long time." This will help avoid many conflicts.

32. And do not allow yourself to be drawn into generalized expressions.

If someone is addressing you in the vein of "you're always late," don't fight back. Answer what you can agree with: “yes, I really don’t always time my time.” The interlocutor will not have the resources to maintain the conflict. You will receive information for reflection: maybe it’s really worth considering your schedule more carefully?

To the one who says: “it won’t work anyway”, “there won’t be enough money for this”, “there are many other things to do”.

This is not about the voice of reason that resists sitting on social networks or the tenth unnecessary purchase. We are talking about that internal censor, because of which many important and successful projects did not take place and which seeks to deprive self-confidence.

34. When the mechanism “it won’t work anyway” is turned on - find counterarguments!

No time? But you can always set aside at least an hour. What will others say? Perhaps they will say: “How good it turned out!” Fight, don't fold your arms.

35. Put yourself in the shoes of your inner critic.

Imagine that it is you who is preventing another from making and implementing a decision. Think about what intentions are driving at the same time, what makes you do this? This will help you find counterarguments and understand yourself.

36. If some quality of another person causes irritation, this is a signal to take a closer look at yourself.

Often we are annoyed in other people by what we do not like in ourselves, but are afraid to admit.

37. If possible, avoid value judgments about people - this will allow you to focus more on your development, and not on criticizing others.

38. Study psychology.

Knowing people and their motives will change life for the better, and understanding how best to behave in a given situation, even more so.

39. Don't be attached to money.

They are needed in order not to think about them. Feel free to spend what you earn, use your finances for your pleasures.


40. And if you already like to spend the entire salary for the week - try to change your habits and make savings.


41. Beat procrastination.

This quality interferes with a variety of people in different fields of activity. Start doing here and now, not postponing for the mythical “later”.

42. Give up conflicts.

Do not enter into an argument for the sake of an argument, avoid conflicting personalities.

43. Stop "kicking" yourself like a negligent subordinate.

Start cooperating with yourself as with a polite and professional business partner who does not let you down.

44. Master the Pareto rule: 20% of effort brings 80% of the result.

First, do the important things that will solve most of the issues, and then the details. Here are some examples of how this rule can be applied in real life.

45. Determine the circle of closest friends.

There can be many pleasant acquaintances, but only a few are worth seriously counting on. Be close to those who matter and don't have high expectations from random buddies.

46. ​​Choose the minimum clothing required for most situations.

Secure your basic wardrobe: a few durable, high-quality all-rounders to accessorize with.

47. Find your work niche in which you will develop, and go deeper in this direction.

Don't be scattered: one main occupation should bring the largest part of the income. If you find something more profitable, focus on this new activity.

48. A small number of mentors provide the bulk of knowledge.

One omniscient guru - good, two - very good, three - see how not to get confused in their advice. Find someone to support you, but don't expect advice from everyone at once. Listen to different people, trust proven ones.

But suppose both procrastination and conflict have long been defeated. You glanced through all the previous points, which are already a passed stage or something completely unknown. What can you advise to those who are successful, happy and still striving for more?

49. Conquer Everest.

Or, for starters, at least Goverla. Reaching the top in the literal sense is the best way to fill life with new colors.

50. Skydive.

51. Spend your vacation hitchhiking.

52. Buy a bike.

Ride it to work, on weekend trips. You will get not only an active lifestyle, but also new acquaintances with the same people.

53. Try scuba diving.

54. Go to an unfamiliar country with no money in your wallet.

Find a part-time job there to earn a living, meet the locals and find out how they live, try your hand. Not everyone decides to do this, but they return from such trips as completely different people.

55. Create your own project in which you can share knowledge and skills in areas where you have accumulated solid experience.

Think: what do you like to do in your free time, what do you feel like a professional in? It is not necessarily what brings money or practical benefit now. If you find people who are interested in the same things and who need valuable advice, you will be able to monetize your "useless" hobby in the future.

56. Have a baby.

This is the most effective way to make changes in your life for years to come.

And what can you think of less extreme, but also important?

57. Introduce family traditions: dinner together or weekend hikes.

58. Visit relatives whom you have not seen for a long time.

59. Love sports.

It will help develop discipline, stress resistance, willpower - these qualities are never enough. Among all the variety of its species, there is sure to be something that will appeal to you. Here are some options.

60. Sign up for a pool.

This is not only swimming, but also diving, and if you like to work in a team, then synchronized swimming or water polo. In water, there is less risk of injury, and at the same time, all muscle groups receive a suitable load.

61. Those who love team sports probably already play football or basketball.

But they are worth a try for those who consider themselves an introvert. Such a change can reveal the unknown facets of the personality and show what it is like to work in a team.

62. And for those who do not think of themselves outside the team, it will be useful to play a few games of table tennis or badminton, where you have to rely only on your own strength.

63. Try yourself in martial arts.

Each of them has its own philosophy, from which something important can be learned. And besides, such skills can be useful outside the gym.

64. Learn to play chess.

And if you already know how - there is no limit to perfection! Find a partner you can exercise with regularly, or start making your own goals.

65. Hang a horizontal bar in the doorway of your room.

Every time you enter or exit, do pull-ups. This also applies to girls - such exercises will not make the shoulders masculine, but they will strengthen both the muscles and self-confidence.

66. Walk more - to and from work, at least part of the way. Use the stairs instead of the elevator.

67. Go camping.

Travel agencies offer many options - hiking in the home country and foreign landscapes, mountain, water and even bicycle tours. This is a type of holiday that you need to try at least once in your life. Even one such vacation changes life for the better - it is an opportunity to spend time in an active and cheerful company, see breathtakingly beautiful places and test your strength. Here, too, there is plenty to choose from.

68. Alloys - on kayaks or catamarans, along a mountain stream or a calm river.

It will leave a pleasant impression for those who love water, and will bring incomparable pleasure from rowing. Plus, you don’t have to carry a heavy backpack on this trip.

69. Hiking - on the plains or mountains, in any case, invigorate and strengthen.

A heavy backpack is nothing compared to the light nature of experienced tourists, unforgettable places and adventures, satisfaction at the end of the journey.

70. Winter outings.

For those who have tried summer outdoor activities, it may be interesting to see familiar places in winter: frozen waterfalls and rivers, or caves in which the temperature is constant all year round. Not to mention such traditional winter entertainment as skiing. If you haven't tried it, discover it for yourself.


What to do at home?

You have returned from an alloy or from the mountains, determined to continue to change your usual way of life. Where to apply it?

71. Rearrange your room.

This will be a kind of breath of fresh air for the brain - such shakes and the need to change the usual course of action are useful to it.

72. Try new cuisine: Italian (and not only pizza), Georgian, Brazilian…

73. Love mornings and Mondays.

It sounds like a mockery, but in fact, you should not be aggressive about a new beginning and a clean slate.

74. Every evening make a plan for the next day.

75. Get a pet.

Let's dwell here in more detail.

76. Getting a dog will be useful for those who are not against daily walks and an active lifestyle.

And for those who are against it, it is especially useful. Having to get out of the house and pay attention to an active animal will change your life for the better - even if it doesn't feel like it at first. And the friendliness and devotion of the beast will show that all this is not in vain.

77. Cats are started by those who want to find an affectionate friend, but are ready for the friend to turn out to be self-willed and self-confident.

And if you take an animal from a shelter, then pride in a good deed done will be added to the pleasant impressions.

78. For those for whom both a cat and a dog are too large-scale acquisition, you can get rats.

It is in the plural - these animals are especially cheerful and playful in groups (of course, same-sex, although you can also change the usual way of life by establishing a rat nursery). Decorative rat pups are different from their wild relatives - they are sociable and not at all vicious. Communication with them will bring many pleasant moments. And their tails are not bald at all.

79. Set up an aquarium at home.

It will be an excellent decoration of the room, not to mention the opportunity to admire living creatures, which, moreover, do not need to be bathed.

80. Take pictures.

At least on the phone. At least for yourself. This will help to see what a multifaceted world is around. You will begin to notice different unique moments of life.

81. Learn something new, related to the main occupation.

Something you haven't dealt with yet, but want to try. If you sew, try embroidery as well. If you're a programmer, learn to test your programs, if only just to get an idea. This will expand horizons and knowledge, and can also be a bonus for employers.

82. And a similar method with a significant difference: try to learn something that you are not sure about.

What you think is not for you. Consider yourself a humanist - understand the basics of mathematics or physics. If you think you can't sing, take some vocal lessons. To change your lifestyle, change yourself.

83. Travel more often.

It can be either the opposite mainland or another area of ​​the city. Or a nearby town where you can go for the weekend.

84. Study your city: its history, architecture.

You will recognize familiar places from an unknown side and begin to appreciate the places you live in.

85. Read more.

Make it a rule to read one book a week. Or in two weeks, if the schedule does not allow.

86. Take out the trash.

Give it to those who need it more, or recycle it.

87. Clean up your computer.

Work will become faster and more efficient.

88. Cross out things you can't complete..

Give up or complete, but don't drag along - make life easier.

89. Find a side job.

Anything that will please and inspire. It will open up new horizons.

90. Make a new acquaintance.

91. Volunteer.

Philanthropy will help you find the individual meaning of life and give you confidence that you are not living in vain.

What exactly can you apply yourself to?

92. Help an animal shelter.

You can take the animal for overexposure, find a new family for it, buy medicines or food, or help with actions - in any large city there is a problem of homeless animals, and working hands are always needed there. If you cannot be indifferent to our smaller brothers, but do not have the time, help with finances, this is also always relevant.

93. Collaborate with an orphanage.

Children always need toys, new clothes, hygiene products, and even more - attention and care. Volunteers often arrange trips, showing children deprived of parental love that the world is not indifferent to them. They also arrange programs for teenagers, helping them to adapt in society. You can become a mentor for someone who is just starting to live - it will be priceless for his life, and he will certainly be grateful.

94. Work with people with disabilities.

There are programs that offer them help - everyday or simple communication, which these people often lack.

95. Just donate money to trusted charities from time to time.

On bank cards, you can enable the function to do this automatically, and change for the better every month.

And a few more simple tips.

96. Fix your handwriting.

97. Master calligraphy, if the handwriting is already beautiful.


98. Visit the dentist: This is a health benefit and a step towards courage.

99. Start a dream. Even if it's impossible.

100. Get off the internet! You won't change your life until you take action.

Photo: Kasia Bialasiewicz/Rusmediabank.ru

A constant vague premonition that something is wrong, bad sleep, frequent irritation, a desire to quit everything ... Perhaps you yourself do not fully understand what is happening to you. But psychologists, who have long observed such symptoms in many people, are sure that such a mood and well-being is a clear sign that it is time to change something in life. Are you not sure? Then check yourself - we have collected the most common and iron signs that it's time to start a new life.

1. Nothing pleases you, and life seems like a “groundhog day”, when each new day is exactly the same as the previous one. If such a state lasts not a day or two or a week, but months, this is a serious reason to think.

2. You don't feel any emotion. is a normal occurrence in human life. It's not about the fact that you are a reserved person and do not show them, it's about the fact that you simply do not feel them. They tell you bad news - and you don't care, good news - the result is the same. In this way, our brain reacts to severe stress, constant tension and the onset of depression.

3. You live in the past or in the future. You either constantly experience bad moments from the past, or remember the wonderful old times, or live only in dreams of the future - any of the options forces you to fully concentrate on any other period of time, except for the present. No, remembering pleasant moments and rejoicing, sad ones - and learning useful lessons or dreaming a little about plans for the coming years - is not bad and even useful. However, if dreams or memories begin to occupy a large part of life, then difficulties begin in the present.

4. You stopped caring about your health and appearance. Is the tooth in need of treatment? Oh, wait until it hurts! Hike to ? No time! Iron the dress? Yes, and it will do! Some even justify their untidiness and unwillingness to take care of themselves by the need to take care of a husband, children, aging parents ...

5. You start to notice strange things about yourself - for example, when you pick up a book, you re-read it three times to get the point, and when you write an important email, after sending it, you find a lot of typos in it, although it seems that you checked everything several times. Yes, once everything can be attributed to fatigue and inattention. However, if this is repeated from time to time, this is an occasion to think.

6. You are constantly anxious. It seems that there are no special reasons or that the same circumstances did not cause you such frustration before. As soon as the husband stays ten minutes from work, the imagination paints the darkest pictures, and if the son or daughter does not answer on the mobile, this is generally the end of the world. Even the most ordinary situations cause you to have bouts of excitement and dozens of questions “What if ...” In the face of any possible troubles, you feel helpless, and thinking about the future is simply paralyzing.

7. You stopped developing as a . Childhood dreams have already been forgotten (after all, they are still unrealistic!), There is no desire to learn something new (and why?), You don’t set any goals for yourself (I have enough at home and work) ... We hasten to upset you: if you fell into such a trap, it means things are bad - after all, a person never stands still, he either goes forward or rolls back. If at the moment, watching TV shows with a plate of sandwiches on your lap seems to be the best pastime for you, it's time to change something.

8. You are constantly jealous. Envy is one of the serious symptoms that indicates that you are unhappy with your current life. If everything suited you in your own share, would you envy other people's successes and joys?!

9. You have not cleaned up your home for a long, long time. A mountain of unwashed dishes, a bunch of things in the chair because you “didn’t bring” them to the closet, dirty socks under the bed, the wallet is ready to fall apart - but not from money, but from checks and receipts six months ago, bottles in the bathroom have long begun to play the role decor because you forgot the last time you threw empty jars in the trash... And you still keep your shorts in the closet from adolescence, knowing that you will never wear them in your life, as well as a dressing gown that is worn to holes and a tracksuit with shiny knees. It seems like it's time to get down to business - get rid of everything unnecessary, broken, unused, torn, spoiled, small, not your style, tasteless, and also annoying. Then life will seem better!

10. You constantly put off important things for later. You have neither the desire nor the strength to decide something now, as a result, things accumulate according to the snowball principle, and you don’t even have the desire to deal with it.

11. You feel about loved ones. Beloved husband, children, parents and friends suddenly began to cause you constant and irresistible irritation. Any little thing can throw you off balance, and previously pleasant conversations with family and friends now seem like stupid and unnecessary chatter. Perhaps this is how your brain reacts to the need for changes in life - and in order to realize this and come to them, it requires some solitude.

Each person faces difficulties and problems, and at such moments we understand that it is time to change our lives. Seven simple ways will help you find happiness, get rid of troubles and open a new page in your life.

You have probably met people whose life seems boring and monotonous more than once. Lack of a good job, low salary, problems in personal life are not the only reasons that can lead us to disappointment. Despite this, each person can find happiness, but for this you will have to make an effort, work on yourself and completely change your attitude to life. Many people experience a fear of change, fearing everything new and unknown. However, site site experts recommend that you overcome your fears as soon as possible and start your life from scratch. A few simple guidelines will help you with this.

love your life

There are ups and downs in everyone's life. Once in a difficult situation, a person begins to mistakenly think that this could happen only to him. However, each of us has problems, and our task is to get rid of them, and not give up and fall into depression.

Learn to accept with dignity any surprises that life has prepared for you, even if they are unpleasant. Try to wake up every morning with the thought that you love your life. To make sure of this, learn to look at things rationally and prioritize correctly. If you are having difficulties at work, take it as a temporary test that you must overcome with dignity in order to achieve career heights. If you want to spend the evening doing what you love, and not cleaning, do not deny yourself this. Once you understand that living in pleasure is not so difficult, you will love your life and learn to enjoy every new day.

Set a goal for yourself

In order for life to take on a special meaning, it is important to understand what you live for and what you want to move towards. When a person attends work only to pay bills and lives with an unloved person in order to save a family, this is just self-sacrifice that does not have a goal to strive for. For your goal to be truly cherished, you need to understand what exactly you want from life.

If you want to have a strong and happy family, strive to become a good family man and caring parent. If you want to be creative and showcase your work, try to develop your talent. If your goal is career growth, try to immerse yourself in work and develop. Any goal is feasible, the most important thing is to strive to achieve it and move forward.

Find a passion

In addition to everyday activities, it is important to find something that you simply enjoy doing. With the help of hobbies, you will learn how to spend time usefully and even develop new talents in yourself. Most often, people who do not have a favorite pastime, free time is limited to watching TV, meaningless phone calls and other activities that do not bring benefits.

To start life from scratch, learn to be productive. Try to accept the fact that every minute in our life has its value, and if you miss one of them, you risk losing a rare opportunity to move towards your goal. Through hobbies such as knitting, embroidery or assembling construction sets, you can get rid of stress and tension, as well as learn to concentrate your attention. If you have always dreamed of learning how to draw, but your skills are still far from ideal, start developing them right now, and perhaps soon you will be able to outshine famous artists. In the modern world, as hobbies, many people choose to attend training courses and trainings. With their help, you can gain new knowledge, and most importantly, spend time correctly and with pleasure.

Change your social circle

Of course, old friends are always better than new ones, but this rule does not apply in all cases. If you want to change your life in the first place, you will have to carefully review your social circle. To begin with, stop communicating with problem people, envious people and eternal pessimists. Interaction with them will not bring you any benefit, but the harm from them will be much greater. Second, get rid of critics and hypocrites. It is unpleasant to communicate with such people, and friendship with them can even be dangerous for your reputation. Meet smarter, more open, sincere, and more successful people. Their level of intelligence, social status and inner qualities will constantly motivate you, which means that soon you will be able to achieve any goals and find happiness.

Listen to the inner voice

Intuition is your main assistant in any situation. Many people do not even realize what their inner voice is capable of. You have probably noticed how, being in a difficult situation, we panic or experience fear, but suddenly we ourselves find a way out of the situation. It is at such moments that one cannot do without the help of intuition. Of course, you should not deny the advice of loved ones, because very often they are correct and useful. However, in order to start life anew, you must learn to trust yourself and be honest with yourself. Only then will the voice within you guide you to the right path. So that intuition never fails you, start developing it daily, a few simple ways will help you with this.

Stop feeling guilty

Throughout life, we make many mistakes, and some of them make us suffer from remorse. However, if you want life to open new pages for you, you need to get rid of guilt for the mistakes you have made. It is important to understand that negative memories will drag you into the past and prevent you from moving forward. Of course, you will not be able to cross out what you have experienced, but it is quite possible to forget, let go of all the negativity and get rid of the excess burden. As soon as you stop feeling guilty, life will immediately sparkle with bright colors, which means that soon you will be able to be at the pinnacle of happiness.

Be sure you are ready to change your life

The last and most important step is your confidence that you are ready to change your life. If what is happening does not allow you to develop, and everything that happens around leads you to disappointment, then it is time to change something. Getting used to new changes is not so easy, but after overcoming a difficult period of getting used to, you will realize that your efforts were worth the result. Take any difficulties as a gift of fate that will help you develop and achieve your cherished goals.

Happiness is a concept that does not have a precise definition. To become a truly happy person, it is enough to find inner harmony and live in harmony with others around you. By observing the five laws of the universe, you can find happiness and change your life for the better. We wish you success and prosperityand don't forget to press the buttons and

These ten rules will help you change your life for the better forever. Follow them and you will find a full, calm, comfortable and happy life.

This is the only constant component of our life. We cannot avoid them, but the more we resist change, the more difficult our lives become. Trust me, I know this because I have been an expert at rejecting change in my life. We are surrounded by change, and it is the one thing that has the strongest impact on our lives. Change can catch up with you at any point in your life. Then they cannot be avoided, they will find you, challenge you, and force you to reconsider how you live your life.

They can enter our lives as a result of a crisis, as a result of a choice, or by accident. In any case, we are faced with the need to make a choice - are we changing our lives or not? I think it's better to choose change than to be forced to accept it.

However, we cannot avoid unexpected events (crises) in our lives, because it is these events that challenge our calmness in life. How we can control these complex events depends on how we choose to respond to them. It is our power of choice that allows us to activate .

By acting on our power of choice, we create more likely conditions for changing our lives for the better.

These 10 ways will change your life forever for the better:

  1. Find meaning in life

  2. Take some time to try and figure out what's important in your life and why it's important. What is it what do you want to achieve in your life? What are you dreaming about? What makes you happy? Your meaning in life gives you purpose and direction in which you want to live your life. Without meaning, you will spend the rest of your life wandering pointlessly through life with no direction, focus, or purpose.

  3. Create a Dream Board

  4. When we were kids, we dreamed all the time. We have been skilled at dreaming and visualizing what we will be when we grow up. We thought everything was possible. When we grew up, then lost the ability to dream. Our dreams became hidden and we began to feel that it was next to impossible to achieve our dreams.

    Dream Board is a great way for us to start believing in our own dreams again. Watching our dreams on the board every day, they begin to come true. Our dreams become reality, and we begin to believe in the possibility of achieving these dreams.

  5. Set goals to achieve your dreams

  6. Once you have decided what is important in your life and what does your dream look like you need to set long, medium and short term goals. These goals will help you.

    Remember that your goals may change. Always be flexible with setting and achieving your goals. Your goals should reflect your life changes. These are the small steps you take to create the momentum for change in your life.

  7. Leave your regrets

  8. Regrets will only move you backwards. are events of the past, and if you spend all your time thinking about the past, then miss the present and the future. You cannot change what you have already done or not done in the past, so let it go. The only thing you have is control over today - what choices you make in order to live your present and future life.

    I had a bunch of regrets that kept me in my life. I stumbled upon "Balloon of Regrets" and shed her regrets forever. What is it? It's easy - blow up as many balloons as you need. On each balloon write regret and then let the balloon fly away. As the balloon drifts into the sky, say goodbye to that regret forever. A simple yet powerful exercise that works and can change your lifestyle.

  9. Pick something really scary and then do it

  10. This is necessary in order to get out of your comfort zone. Public speaking is one of the scariest things anyone can say. I was overwhelmed by the public speaking, however, I knew I wanted to be a motivational speaker. So I joined Toastmasters to overcome my fear of public speaking. My first speech was scary for me, my knees were shaking, I was breaking into a sweat and I couldn't stop shaking. But I did it and the feeling after finishing this speech, although it was terrible, was wonderful. I decided to continue in this direction, and now I make a living as a motivational speaker. I still get nervous when I get up to give a speech, but these are nervous nerves, and I like them.

    Make a list of scary things that you like but are too afraid of. Put the list on the table and then go and do them. Never stop doing scary things then your life will become really calm and comfortable.

  11. Start living a balanced life

  12. Our health does not remain the same. Our physical, emotional and spiritual states change as we get older. What we can control comes from how we feed our mind and body. A balanced and healthy life builds our resistance to the physical changes of our body. Exercise is the best way we can achieve a positive and optimistic attitude towards life.

    Live a healthy, balanced life with plenty of exercise is a lifestyle choice that will no doubt help you change your life for the better and make it happier, more satisfied and fulfilling.

  13. Face your fears


  14. It's easy to ignore our concerns and we hope they go away on their own. Unfortunately, that's not how it works. If you want to change your life for the better, learn to manage your fears so that they can no longer control you. Our fears are just thoughts in our minds that are not real, but over time we begin to believe that they are true. These are our fears in life that prevent us from living our lives to the fullest. We know exactly when our fears control our lives because we feel unhappy, dissatisfied and inferior.

    After we face our fears we will take back our power to choose how we want to live our lives. And when we do this, we change your life forever.

  15. accept yourself

  16. The only person who going to change your life, it is you! and creating these changes, you must love yourself. There will be a time in your life where you will face rejection, and there will be. Accept yourself as you are and love yourself it will help you move forward in life. Keeping yourself down all the time wishing yourself to be better will only lead you to a life of unhappiness and discontent.

    Find courage, love yourself, go out and do something crazy. Don't worry about what someone thinks of you, whether it's right. If you feel in your heart that you are doing the right thing, take action and create the life you love.

  17. Live in this moment

  18. Many of us tend to think that the grass is greener on the other side. Often we find ourselves on the other side of the fence, and we realize that this is not so. to change our lives, comes from our desire to be happy. We are often so busy focusing on our the pursuit of happiness that we miss the joy that actually lives in the present. Our desire to have happiness in our lives is the desire for our future state, not the present. We are so wrapped up in all our problems and discontents today that we miss the precious beauty of the moment.

    Sitting on the beach eating ice cream with your best friend or is moment of happiness. By appreciating and showing gratitude on a daily basis, we experience happiness in the moment. Helping those in need brings joy and happiness to us. All of this is life in this moment - don't miss these moments because you are too busy focusing on your pursuit of happiness.

  19. Experience the joy of knowing

  20. Every time you learn something new, you gain more knowledge, and with that, in turn, comes more self-confidence. Education helps us to be more flexible to new situations. Learning encourages us to be more imaginative and creative in our thinking. Through learning, we feel more comfortable with the unknown.

    Reading of books is a great way for us to learn. In order to change your life for the better and fully embrace the joy of learning, never stop reading, seek more knowledge. Learning gives our lives meaning, and that's what makes our life worth living.

You have the choice to do what you want to change your life. The choice to act on these 10 rules, without a doubt, will change your life for the better and forever . So what are you waiting for? Go do these 10 things right now!

Motivational video about changing your life right now.