Marry

What is the best age to get married. Age of marriage in Russia. Marriage age.

AT Slavic culture the topic of marriage has always been given Special attention. Time runs, everything changes, and marriage traditions do not remain unchanged. For example, ideas about the ideal age for marriage vary widely across generations.

Here, a beautiful 27-year-old girl sits in front of me and sadly says that her grandmother and mother are very worried, no matter how she remains in the “girls”. But she does not want to rush, she has not yet met her love, but the experience and discomfort are on her face. When people ask me what is the ideal age for marriage today, I do not hesitate to answer the question with a question: "Ideal for whom?! Who should be satisfied, happy, so to speak, the winner?" And here lies the main difficulty. A few decades ago on the territory of the USSR main value there was a country, and my grandmother repeated with complete confidence: "I am the last letter of the alphabet." Accordingly, her ideal age for marriage was due to the benefit of the state, and main goal it was as early as possible to get married, give birth and raise worthy Soviet citizens. Today, in Ukraine, young people are increasingly putting the interests of their own self in the first place, that is, their career, realization, the truth of their feelings for a partner and the choice of a suitable couple. Your spiritual development, moving forward, physical health and good health. Increasingly, having heard the "diagnosis" of an old-bearing woman in the maternity hospital, women smile, but do not worry. Modern Europe gave us a certain standard, an example to follow, where a 34-year-old bride is considered young, and marriages before this age are considered early. Speaking about the dangers that lie in wait for young spouses, it is important to note the still undeveloped ability for constructive dialogue and unprocessed parental programs and scenarios when young people, unwittingly, build a family in the image and likeness of their parents. But it is great and positive that there is an opportunity to grow, develop and move forward together, gradually transforming in relationships from love to partnership. Late marriages do not exist for me, except that a woman wants to have children, and purely physiologically her childbearing function is over - then it's sad. As for the rest, I don’t see any problems and barriers, because there are a lot of resources - there is experience, maturity, and wisdom. Regarding marriages with a large age difference, there is a danger of not being equal partners, but playing in a family in parent-child relationships, when the older partner acts as a father or mother, and the younger one acts as a daughter or son, being on full content at the first. For the children playing the role in this case, this is a road to nowhere. And when entering into such relationships, it is important to remember about self-realization, self-actualization in society, and only then love and partnership are possible. Timely marriage to you! member of the Ukrainian Union of Psychotherapists Liliya Kopytova

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American scientists told the public about the results of their study regarding adultery. Doctors have determined at what age women and men are especially loving and far from being with their soul mates. David Schmitt from Bradley University believes that at 30 years of age the reproductive function of the fair sex is somewhat weakened, and subconsciously a woman seeks to use every chance for pregnancy. That is why she goes through partners for a long time until she finds what she needs.

How do you know if you are ready for marriage?

Every relationship has to end sooner or later. new level: loving friend friend, people easily become a family and give birth to children, but if they come up with excuses from the registry office, then they are not quite ready for some kind of logical continuation of their relationship. Until they are ready or will never be ready - it all depends on the priorities, desires and goals of young people. Often, girls do not want to marry their chosen ones because of the lack of finances for a luxurious wedding, they expect a beautifully made proposal.

Marriage is a very useful thing for society. Yes, this is the simplest microgroup, but it helps to organize the whole society and realize the task of reproducing offspring. If now there was no such thing as a family, then it would be impossible to socialize a child normally. And educate him. And feed. In general, society would not develop, but human species just died. This article will consider the issue of marriage, its functions, as well as such important problem as the age of marriage in Russia. Many young people are interested in this problem. And it turns out that it's not just that. After all, they have yet to start a family.

What is marriage?

Marriage is legal family relationships. That is, if two people live under the same roof and raise a child, this does not mean that this is a marriage. There is such a cool word as But if you look at the logic, it turns out that only those family relationships that are officially fixed are such.

But in general, with regard to the concept of family and marriage in particular, it is rather difficult to formulate an unambiguous definition. In total, there are two sociological and legal. And the concepts are somewhat different, although the same phenomenon is considered. But since our article is more legal (although it is somewhat stupid to separate jurisprudence from sociology in this aspect), we will consider marriage with legal point vision.

marriage properties

The age of marriage in Russia is indeed a very important and debatable issue. There is only one reason for this - how people of a certain age category are able to create a full-fledged family. What properties does she have? What is the nature of marriage? By what elements can we recognize that we are really dealing with marriage? It will mean a full-functioning family that does its job perfectly.

Legal security.
Common property.
The spouses are people of different sexes who are not united by blood ties.
One of the persons does not have another legally fixed marriage.

Such signs help to judge that we are really dealing with marriage.

Functions of marriage

Marriage, as a very important component of the life of society and a person in particular, performs a huge number of functions. And for them to be fully implemented, the age of marriage in Russia must be set at the right level. Although in fact it turns out that 18 years are not yet the years when a person is psychologically ready for family life. However, on the other hand, young people can better adapt to each other. Therefore, there will be fewer conflicts. But what functions should marriage perform?

Reproduction of offspring. This is the main task that he sets for himself. Therefore, the main requirement that characterizes the age of marriage in Russia (or rather, one of the main ones) is the ability to provide, purely in theory, optimal conditions for this task.
Support. Naturally, together (and in the future - three together) it is much easier to experience problems in life. For example, if one person cannot earn money and feed children at the same time (as happens in the past, then the second person can take on this task. And in the future, children will also be able to connect to support. It is much more difficult to survive crises on your own.
Socialization. Reproduction of offspring is a good task. It certainly is. But the family as a whole still performs very well. important function. It acts as the primary child, that is, it helps him adapt to the world. Main social norms that the child learns come from the family. If they do not swear in it, then the child will not do this either. Etc.

These are the three main functions. As you can see, the main task of the family is to unite to raise offspring. This can be called a kind of supertask. And marriageable age should be such that people not only can reproduce offspring, but also be able to take care of others. And here it is in young age rare enough. But it is on mutual care that marriage is built.

Family types

Based on how well the family performs its functions, it can be functional or dysfunctional. In the first case, the family does its job completely well. Of course, a fully functional family is a myth. Every person has their share of selfishness. And of course, it prevents him from showing normal care. It complicates the fact that one member of the family may not have enough care, and the second believes that it gives a lot.

If all these difficulties reach a critical point, then we are talking There are really many such marriages. But as for such a topic as marriageable age, everything is complicated here. On the one hand, young people are more selfish. On the other hand, it is easier to adapt to the requirements social group. That is, it is initially more conformist. This makes it easier to create a functional family.

The marriage process

And what kind of marriage can be called legal? This issue is also quite controversial to understand. After all, each person under the concept of "Legal marriage" means his own. For example, religious people will not consider a simple stamp in their passport to be legal. But if they get married in the church, then he will be like that. As you can see, everything is relative. What is the legal process of getting married? What requirements must be met?

Persons must not be registered in another marriage.
People don't have to be close relatives.
Also, marriage is not possible between those who adopted a child and adopted children.
If at least one marriage is recognized as mentally ill.
People must be diverse.

The requirements are fairly simple. Therefore, many enter into legal marriage.

Marriage age

Registration of marriage in Russia is possible only if both newlyweds have reached the age of 18. However, in some cases, you can lower the bar by court order. When is registration available for younger people?

Pregnancy.
Birth of a child. If it has already happened that the child was born to minors, then they can lower the threshold for marriage.
Call to the army.
Installed family life. That is, if two young people are already living as husband and wife, they are also raising a child, that is, there are all legal grounds for lowering the age of marriage.

But it is important to understand that the court considers all cases individually. So the possibility of marriage for minors is still mostly unavailable.

Registration of marriage for minors - requirements

If you are a minor and want to put a stamp in your passport, marriage registration will be available for you only with the following conditions provided for by the RF IC:

The reduction cannot be more than two years. That is, the maximum age can be reduced to 16 years.
The reasons must be really good, and not just the desire of two teenagers.
The question of whether it is possible to register a marriage of two minors is decided at the place of registration.
Parental consent is not required.
A person entering into marriage is given almost full civic responsibility. That is, he becomes an adult at the state level earlier.

findings

We figured out what age of marriage is accepted in Russia. At the same time, it is important to understand that although the minimum threshold is still 16 years old, in exceptional cases it can be reduced to 14 in some areas. Such are the laws.

In the era of the sexual revolution, many young people are asking what age is considered the most successful for bonding themselves with marriage. If even 2-3 decades ago guys and girls were in a hurry to legitimize their bonds up to 23-25 years old, today this bar has crossed over 30 years. Today, early sex is welcome, but marriage at a young age is not becoming fashionable. Why get married, if you can still take a walk, build a career, and we still have time to spend money on family life and diapers: 70% of the guys think about this.

Marriage at 30

Surveys of men and women indicate that the most optimal age men for marriage is exactly 30 years old! Here are some important arguments:

1. “30” years is the most meaningful and sober age for a man, when he seriously begins to think about creating a family, about his future and perceives the girl not for one night, but considers her as a life partner.

2. After 30 years, a man is already tired of bachelor life, partying and drinking, he loses interest in night walks, and there is a desire to be in a cozy, quiet family environment, with his soulmate. It is believed that before this age, a man has already walked up, experienced many emotional storms and is psychologically ready for a new round in his life.

3. In addition, the older the man, the stronger he is in financial terms stands on his feet and realistically assesses his chances, the ability to provide for his family, and not sit "on the shoulders of his parents."

4. At this age, there is a conscious desire to have a child. By the way, such a desire is the main sign of a man's readiness to become a family man.

5. A 30-year-old man is already able to compromise, be able to cope with his ambitions, becomes more patient. Thus, any domestic troubles can be resolved with the help of agreements, without creating trifling quarrels in the family. The fewer quarrels and misunderstandings in the family, the stronger the marriage.

Thus, a man after 30 is independent in his decision, financially mature and ready to take full responsibility for his family.

Marriage at 40

As for men after 35-40 years, scientists and doctors do not consider this age ideal for creating a marriage for the first time. The thing is that by the age of 40, changes in male and female physiology begin, and many couples have problems conceiving a child. In addition, it will be more and more difficult for a forty-year-old man to choose a life partner every year, as he becomes more selective with age and gets more used to loneliness. Many men who could not get married before the age of 35 become depressed and put an end to their marital status.

Good luck with your marriage!

Instruction

Ideal age for marriage, everyone has their own. Someone already at the age of 18 is ripe for a serious relationship and is ready to propose to his beloved. And yet, in most cases, it turns out that a man who marries early then begins to experience discomfort from the loss of his freedom, the lack of constant relationships with friends, and the many restrictions that family and marriage impose on him. Ultimately, this can lead to problems in the family, a crisis in a man, and even divorce.

The current structure of society is such that financial opportunities very young people still have few, but there are plenty of temptations to spend their youth vigorously and cheerfully. Studying at school until the age of 18, then the institute and the army stretch the age of entry young man in the adult period up to 22-23 years. But even this age in society is considered too early for marriage, because you still need to start a career, earn your first money, learn how to provide for yourself, and not live with your parents.

In addition, there are huge opportunities for entertainment in big city postpone the date of marriage for a while. Do you want to shift the burden of responsibility on yourself when there is funny company friends and you can lead an interesting, rich life without thinking about serious things? All this leaves its mark on the personality of a young man, showing in him signs of immaturity and unpreparedness for marriage even after coming of age.

But time passes, and a man begins to think more about a career and creating a serious relationship. This period usually starts at age 24 or 25. It is at this time at the hormonal level that important changes, allowing the body of a man to enter a more measured and calm period of life. However, for each young person, everything is very individual and can begin earlier or a little later than this age. If at this age a man meets a girl with whom he wants to build serious relationship, after a while such a relationship leads to marriage. And such a union will be more deliberate and desirable than when marrying before the age of 20.

The most comfortable for marriage is the age of 30-35 years. This is the period when a young man begins to turn into a real man. He is in his prime, but at the same time he already knows a lot, he is experienced and has managed to take place in his career, he is confident in himself and has many plans for life. At this age, men become excellent fathers and give their children an excellent upbringing. If before this age a man has not yet managed to find his beloved woman, then this is the best time to start looking, and with the specific goal of getting married and creating a family.

Love, security, age - these are perhaps the three fundamental areas for marriage. But if everything is clear with love - it either exists or it does not exist, and with security it is also more or less clear - no one canceled marriages of convenience, then the issue of age is not so simple.

No one will ever give an accurate and unambiguous answer to questions like “At what age is it best to get married” and “What should be the age of spouses for happy marriage". Each couple has their own answer to these questions, and only stubborn statistics say that girls prefer to get married at 20-25 years old, and they usually choose guys older than them by at least 3-6 years.

In our survey (on the main page of the portal), the public is unequivocal in their opinion: the best age for a bride is 20-25 years old. In second place is the age of 25-30 years. Young girls under the age of 20 in our "hit parade of the age of the bride" take an honorable third place.

Marriage age has long been associated with youth and physical maturity, health. According to the law, in Ukraine, boys can marry from the age of 18, girls - from 17. However, there is an exception in the Law: in the presence of special circumstances, marriage can be concluded in more early age. Usually such a "circumstance" is the "accidental" pregnancy of the bride.

But if we omit any “force majeure” circumstances for too early a marriage, several types of families can be distinguished, depending on the age of those entering the barque and the age difference between the spouses.

Early marriage. Of course, to such important issue, like marriage, you need to approach carefully and thoroughly. After all, after the wedding, you associate yourself with your chosen one or chosen one for life. And society quite rightly believes that mature people are capable of making such decisions. Therefore, often the marriage of people aged 18-20, sometimes even 23, is perceived as something premature, not serious. According to statistics, early marriages are the most vulnerable. But, on the other hand, at an early age, feelings and emotions are extremely strong. Love at this age is distinguished by ardor and recklessness, and youthful maximalism sweeps away all obstacles on the way to a loved one. And there are so many couples who have proven that they are able to live happily and prosperously all their lives together, with youthful years and to old age. But still, if you are “impatient” to get married at 18, we advise you to think it over carefully. And preferably without emotion. Remember that early marriages tend to break up in the first year.

Marriage of the Golden Age. The age from about 23 to 26-28 years is considered almost the most suitable for marriage. It should be noted that girls mature earlier than boys, but by the age of 25, the difference in physical and, importantly, psychological terms between peers of both sexes practically disappears. This age is the heyday of man. The most favorable for childbirth. For men, this is the best time physical form, endurance. By the age of 23-25, young people, as a rule, finish their studies and start professional career. They have already decided in life, and can independently provide for the family. Youthful maximalism gives way to an adult outlook on life.

late marriage. At the age of “about 30 or 30 plus”, a wedding is already a conscious, a hundred times weighed decision. Often, at this age, people do not marry for the first time, and they are well aware of what surprises life “after the altar” has in store for them.

Very late marriage. Perhaps it is to our grandfathers and grandmothers that we owe catch phrase"Love for all ages". Such marriages are concluded at 50, 60, 70 and even 80 and more years! And although at this age, love for partners means more support and care for each other, and not a fire in which all worldly hardships burn out - feelings are so strong that it is just right to envy the young.

Marriage between peers. Usually girls marry their peers, unable to resist lengthy courtship. Such a marriage, as a rule, is the result of a long, kindergarten, school or college love. Relationships develop over a long period of time, and the wedding between peers, oddly enough, turns out to be a completely mature and deliberate decision.

The man is older than the woman. It is believed that a man should be a little, 3-4 years older than his wife. Growing up earlier, girls mature and grow old, too, earlier than their husbands. And a small difference in age compensates for the consequences of these processes.

The man is much older than the woman. Young girls in mature men are attracted primarily by their "adulthood". They are sure that such a man will take care of them, shower them with attention and affection, they strive to be married “like behind a stone wall” and the back of a mature, adult husband seems to them to be such a wall. I must say that most often these dreams come true. True, it is impossible to answer the question of what kind of age difference would be reasonable. Girls are happy to marry men who are 10, 20 and even 30 years older than them. And, I must say, many of these brides feel great in the status of wives.

The woman is older than the man. If the difference is small, within 5 years, such a marriage is practically no different from a marriage between peers or a marriage where the man is slightly older than his wife. But today, marriages are increasingly being registered, where a woman is much, from 10 years old, older than a man. In society, such women are considered "masters intimate relationships”, in the eyes of others, they look like real lionesses. Well, rumor tends to ascribe the status of “son” to men in such marriages. Although in reality this is not always the case. The young spouse in such a marriage is, as a rule, tough guy but somewhat immature psychologically. He is touchy, vulnerable, unbalanced. He has very few friends. Most often, it is the wife who acts as the main friend and adviser of her husband, she helps him find a place in life. And although, according to statistics, such marriages do not exist for long, 5-8 years, the young spouse associates success in life precisely with his ex-wife. And often such “ex” remain faithful and best friends for their, also former, wives.

Summing up, I would like to note one thing. Despite the fact that the issue of age for marriage is quite serious, you should not set out to build a relationship precisely within the framework of the ideal, from your point of view, option. People are so different that the criterion of age objectively, in fact, gives only relative characteristics. In any relationship, everywhere and always, you need to listen to the two main advisers. And this is not mom and girlfriend, not dad and uncle - not at all! This is your heart and your head. And these comrades, according to Felix Edmundovich, are radically different - the heart is hot, the head is cold. Therefore, their solutions will have an optimal temperature.